Psychology of “SELF ACTUALISATION”: Are You Self Actualized?๐Ÿ˜Š

๐ŸŒธ…Being Human is given , But keeping our Humanity is a Choice…๐ŸŒธ

With the World facing this Pandemic and Lockdown, we humans are actually forced to introspect ‘self’. We must have realized during this lockdown that our ‘basic needs/requirements ‘are not much,infact it’s our lifestyle that makes us greedy which is neither a necessity nor a basic requirement and at the end of the day all the materialistic things are meaningless.

..It’s once-in-a lifetime opportunity to delve within – Breathe , Rest and Rejuvenate – it’s a beautiful space for Introspection & Self Growth..

We have forgotten we are social animals and ultimate Goal of Humanity is to Serve Humanity Selflessly. When you stop caring about your personal gains and start working for humanity selfless, Ultimate satisfaction and peace you get.

๐ŸŒธIt is our Humanity which makes us spiritual and the Spirit which makes us Human ๐ŸŒธ

Sharing and exploring a beautiful concept of, Psychology of ‘Self Actualisation’ which stresses on the positive, healthy aspects of personality and the uniqueness of the individual. A Humanistic view based on a belief that people are good, active, creative individuals who live in the present and base their actions in the subjective perception of experience. People are seen as active agents in the perception and modification of their own reality and are assumed to be motivated to move towards personal growth and self fulfillment.

**The Ultimate GOAL of HUMAN BEING is SELF -ACTUALISATION and Self-actualisation is nothing but DEFINING ONESELF and then REDEFINING for the BETTERMENT of HUMANITY. **

* The need for Self -Actualisation is not about missing anything or needing anything tangible, but is related to a need for growth, understanding & fulfillment. It arises when one wishes to become, ALL I CAN BECOME “.

*The need for meaning & purpose at this level also means that one becomes more sensitive to large social issues and the welfare of the community ,including the whole human community.

* Self -actualized people have a deep feeling of identification, sympathy and affection for human beings in general. They feel kinship & connection ,as if all people were members of a single family.

**The term self actualisation was first used by the German Psychiatrist, “Kurt Goldstein “(1939) which is built on the assumption that,” every individual ,every plant, every animal has only ONE INBORN GOAL – To Actualize Itself As It Is..

** ..In 1943, Iconic American Psychologist “ABRAHAM MASLOWpresented a THEORY of’ HUMAN MOTIVATION’ that was so Quintessential that it has for decades, been met with strong acceptance and praise..

Maslow’s Humanistic Theory Of Personality” is perhaps the most well known theory of motivation.

* According to this theory, humans are driven to achieve their maximum potential and will always do so unless obstacles are placed in their way. These obstacles include hunger, thirst, financial problems, safety issues or anything else that takes focus away from maximum psychological growth.*

* Humanistic theories of personality emphasizes on personal responsibility and innate tendencies toward personal growth .

* Maslow organized human needs into 5ive main groups in a ‘Hierarchical Fashion ‘. The logic of the hierarchy of needs is that the need at the lower end of hierarchy exert more power in that they exert a greater sense of urgency to be satisfied than the need at the next level. Progressing up the hierarchy of needs results in the individual coming closer to achieving the state of self-actualisation.

The tendency toward self -actualisation is the only drive by which the life of an individual is determined”. At any moment, the individual has the fundamental tendency to actualize all its capacities and its whole potential, as it is present in that exact moment, under the given circumstances.

*Humanistic theory is perhaps the most well known theory of Motivation. According to this theory,

humans are driven to achieve their ‘Maximum Potential’ & will always do so unless obstacles are placed in their way…

* This theory makes an assumption that :

. A Person is motivated as a whole.

. Motivation is complex.

. Man is a ‘wanting animal’.

. Satisfied needs can never be a motivator.

. Man’s needs are arranged in ‘hierarchy’.

* Humanistic Theory of Personality was proposed by Abraham Maslow. This concept suggests that human needs exist in a hierarchy , ranging from psychological needs,on the bottom,through safety needs, social needs, esteem needs, and finally self-actualisation needs at the Top.

* According to Maslow ,lower-order needs must be satisfied before we can turn to more complex, higher-order needs.

…higher-order needs can’t serve as motives until lower-level needs have been satisfied.. thus a hungry person won’t be very interested in Self -actualizing; and one whose safety is threatened won’t focus on gaining others’ approval..

* Maslow has also devoted much attention to the study of people who, are psychologically healthy. These are individuals who have attained high levels of self -actualisation

….a state in which they have reached their fullest’true potential’

…self -actualized people accept themselves for what they are; they recognize their shortcomings as well as their strengths… being in touch with their own personalities, they are less inhibited & less likely to conform than most of us…

Hierarchy Model

# Physiological Needs : The most basic need related to the survival of the individual, they are, Food, shelter, cloth, air, water, sleep and reproduction.Such needs are extremely potent and, when unfulfilled can dominate the life of individual .Biological in nature .

# Safety Needs : The desire for stability, is like creating an environment for living that is free from the threat of danger. The need to feel Physically and Emotionally Safe from harm and genuine threats.

# Love an Belongingness Needs: Social Needs : Affection, love, friendship, acceptance and communication. The desire to be with others directly concerned with the basic desire to feel accepted by and have meaningful interpersonal relationship with others. Belonging to various social organization, community service group as well as member of a family give one a sense of acceptance and belongingness. The need to feel fully and unconditionally supported by someone else and the need to provide such support and love to another.

# Esteem Needs : Status, approval, appreciation, freedom of control, recognition, self-respect, Independence and respect of others. The need to genuinely appreciate and respect oneself.

#Self-Actualisation : Self – development,self-advancement, desire for increased responsibilities and liberation of creative talents. The need to become the best version of yourself that you can be. Developing the individual’s full potential involves the individual’s desire to develop his or her ability to their fullest potential. Such development involves obtaining deeper sense of one’s own desires and ability and maximising their expression in an attempt to bring them together. Individual must be extremely motivated from within to achieve the need.

…. If both the physiological & the safety needs are fairly well gratified, then there will emerge Love, Affection & belongingness needs and the whole cycle already described will repeat itself …

* Self -Actualisation in Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, is the highest level of psychological development where the actualisation of full personal potential is achieved ,which occurs only after basic & mental needs have been fulfilled.

man’s tendency to actualize himself to become his potentialities.. to express & activate all its capacities – Carl Rogers.

* Throughout lives, individuals work toward achieving the top of the pyramid, self-actualisation,or the realization of all of full potential.

…on the way up there are obstacles, also there are incidents than can move an individual down…


…to have achieved this goal is to stop living, because there is nothing else left to do…

* The needs Maslow believed to be higher, healthier and more likely to emerge in self-actualizing people were being needs(B-needs) also called existential or spiritual needs.

existential needs are rooted in need to experience lives more fully and to find MEANING and PURPOSE in LIFE … being needs are FULFILLED but NEVER SATIATED .. include TRUTH, GOODNESS and BEAUTY.. MASLOW also included Unity, Perfection and Completion of finality.. It values aliveness, process,uniqueness and self-sufficiency…

* ..Self Actualized people live more in the real world of nature than in the man-made mass of concepts, abstractions , expectations, beliefs and stereotypes that most people confuse with the world..*

Q U A L I T I E S : of a Self-Actualized Person –

. More Efficient Perception Of Reality

. Acceptance of Self, Others and Nature

. Spontaneity, Simplicity & Naturalness

. Problem – Centering

. The Need for Privacy

. Autonomy

. Continued freshness of Appreciation

. The Peak Experience

…working hard for something we don’t Care is called Stress, and working hard for something ‘We Love’is calledPASSION ‘…


* Because humans are born with a natural tendency to move toward psychological health, any failure to reach self-actualisation can technically be called abnormal development. One such abnormal syndrome is the ‘Jonah Complex’ or fear of being or doing one’s best , a condition that all of us have to some extent. Maslow believed that many people allow false humility to stifle their creativity, which causes them to fall short of self-actualisation.

….Failure to have needs met at various stages of the hierarchy could lead to illness, particularly psychiatric illness Or mental health issues .Individuals whose Physiological needs are not met may become extremely ill , stressful , and in extreme cases it might turn fatal. when safety needs are not met, post-traumatic stress may occur.

P S Y C H O T H E R A P Y :

The hierarchy of needs concept has obvious ramifications for Psychotherapy. Most people who seek psychotherapy probably do so, because they have not adequately satisfied their love and belongingness needs. This suggests that much of therapy should involve a productive human relationship and that the job of a therapist is to help clients satisfy love and belongingness .


The significance of the concept of self-actualisation is also reflected in its application to Personality Assessment. ‘The Personal Orientation Inventory ‘( POI ) is an objective measure most often associated with assessing self -actualisation. The POI was invented by’ Everett L Shostrom’ as an objective means of measuring some of the behaviours and values related to Maslow’s Concept. Involves 2 Major scales and sub-scales. The 10 sub-scales consists of characteristic indicating self-actualisation, including of self-acceptance spontaneity, synergy and capacity for intimate contact.

* Self -actualized people accept themselves for what they are ; they recognize their shortcomings as well as their strengths. Being in touch with their own personalities, they are less inhibited and less likely to conform than most of us.

* Self-actualized people are well aware of the rules imposed by society,but feel greater freedom to ignore them than most persons. Unlike most of us, they seem to retain their childhood wonder and amazement with the world. For them life continues to be an exciting adventure rather than a boring routine.

* Finally, self -actualized persons sometimes have PEAK EXPERIENCES – instances in which they have powerful feelings of unity with the universe and feel tremendous waves of power and wonder. Such experiences appear to be linked to personal growth , for after them individuals report feeling more spontaneous, more appreciative of life, and less concerned with the problems of everyday life.

The more one forgets himself by giving himself to a cause to serve or another person to love – the more human he is and the more he actualizes himself , Self-Actualisation is possible only as a side – effect of self-transcendence…

๐ŸŒธFinding happiness is like finding yourself. You don’t find happiness.. you make happiness choose happiness.. Self-Actualisation is a process of discovering who you are, who you to be and paving the way to happiness by doing what brings you the most meaning and contentment to your life over the long run๐ŸŒธ

Let yourself be drawn by the stronger pull of that which you truly love. A musician must make music, an artist must paint, a poet must write(& so on), if he is to be ultimately at peace with himself.’s only rival is one’s own potentialities.. One’s only failure is failing to live up to one’s own possibilities…

๐ŸŒนAll the evidence that we have indicate that it is reasonable to assume in practically every human being and certainly in almost every new born baby that there is an ACTIVE WILL toward HEALTH, an IMPPULSE towards GROWTH & towards THE ACTUALIZATION ๐ŸŒน

๐ŸŒนA Special Thankful note to my family, my besties and all the good special people who motivate and reinforces positively and serve humanity๐ŸŒน๐Ÿ’–๐Ÿ˜Š


I hope you all enjoyed reading as much as I enjoyed putting it for you ๐Ÿ™‚

๐ŸŒธS T A Y S A F E ๐ŸŒธ

๐ŸŒธS T A Y B L E S S E D ๐ŸŒธ


…..…divya… ๐Ÿ˜Š


Football is played with the Head.. Your Feet are just the Tools..

DEDICATED TO : KIRTI KASHYAP , Coach Odisha FC, India – A coach with a difference : “lesser known are the people who sing away their heroics silently”. The most emotionally & Psychologically stable person n coach I came across who is full of patience & calmness on and off the field. Goes beyond to work on his players to make them smart player,who dares to hold hands of player believing where nobody else does.Does wonders on his students, increasing their graph of performance incredibly. A soft spoken genuine wonderful personality who is passionate about โšฝ. After observing ‘overt behavior ‘of his personality on and off the field for last 6 months, what amazed me was his consistent RESILIENT nature in all the circumstances .For him it’s never ‘I’, it’s ‘WE’.His determination, dedication and passion inspired me to pen down on โšฝ. I asked him,what football to him is? His reply,soul stirring and speaks volume, sharing ;

Kirti Kashyap

motivated me to express World’s most favorite game โšฝ,I enjoyed every bit touching,studying,exploring,compiling this subject which is limitless in terms of mathematical,technical and statistical aspect, which Iam definitely gonna study and share in next part .Sharing a small portion of all the studies, research and psychology of โšฝ to all football lovers ๐Ÿ˜Š.

The ultimate aim of any civilised being is to serve the humanity for its betterment. And an individual who wants to serve humanity has to be in possession of good mental and physical health.

Like a coin has two sides”Heads and Tail”,on the same lines a good education system has also two sides’Academics and Sports .Academics teaches a student the difference between ‘Right and wrong ‘whereas sports teaches an individual to focus, fight against odds and to be instrumental towards team’s win.

Sports reduce anxiety and increase self-esteem. It not only enhances the capabilities to do better under pressure but also helps in developing leadership qualities & social skills. On one hand it’s fun to participate in friendly matches and it’s one of the best stress busters but on other hand the professional tournament are highly demanding and exhibitions of team spirit.

..Sport Psychology is the understanding of how the mind influences a player’s performance in their chosen sports ..

* Sports Psy deals in various concepts such as how a sportsman prefer to learn their personality attainments of relaxation and concentration and how do they learn to visualize a successful performance , understand overcome their limitations and developing high levels of self awareness.

* The most important aspect is coach-player relationship – critical to sporting success . One of the most fundamental aspects of sport psychology, that is within the coach’s role, is to understand their player’s behavioral pattern and their individual personality. All coaches do this to some extent, but the best Coach do this to a deep level. Understanding his players gives a window into how to communicate, build an effective environment for them, insist them to build on their strengths and overcome their weaknesses.

..Sport Psychology can be the difference that makes the difference..


..”Football Psy is a means of developing a player’s mindset to improve performance” matter how naturally talented player is, if they cannot focus, motivate self/others,deal with failure/success and show composure, they cannot bring results to self and to the team.

* The contemporary history of the world’s favorite game spans more than 100 years. It all began in 1863 in England, when rugby football and association football branched off on their different courses and the Football Association in England was formed -becoming the sports first governing body. Old name ‘soccer’ originated in Britain some 200years ago. Invented by Walter Camp who pioneered rule changes that slowly transformed rugby into the new game of American Football , on November 6,1869 Rutgers & Princeton played first American football game at New Brunswick, New Jersey what was billed as the first college of football game.

* Well developed physical, technical and tactical competencies are necessary but not sufficient pre-requisites for success in modern football.

..Research indicates that the most successful players consistently require and employ Psychological Skills to enhance performance .. For eg; relaxation, imagery, goal setting, self-talk etc. These psychological skills training should be a part of training and practice in football.

Myth: Mental and Physical aspects of football are separate.

Growth Mindset

Footballers with ‘growth mindsets’ believe that their abilities can be improved. By focusing on Learning and Improving, they ensure they stay hungry for success and are more likely to develop their abilities.

In all walks of life, people with a growth mindset tend to learn faster & are more successful than their fixed mindset counterparts. A good sports psychologist /Coach help footballers and teams develop a growth mindset, which can boost player development to new levels.

Self Talk

The way you talk to yourself is vitally important. How a footballer talks to themselves can affect their concentration, persistence, stress levels and their emotions which in turn affects their motivation, confidence and overall performance. The way they talk to themselves can also affect their belief that, ‘they can always improve ‘ and their ability to, ‘deal with distractions ‘.

Emotional Control

Players express a range of emotions whilst playing, which is why they work hard to help footballers learn how to control and use their emotions so that they can play at their best.



God is Strength:Praise God

…”True Life comes from God’s Unfailing love working to deliver us”..

..For all my friends and people who messaged me to pen down on strength ..Guys we live every second..Trust God and yourself.. Surround yourself with God’s people emitting same wavelength and positive vibes.. Feel free to express..Never let a ‘Kaash'(wish) come in your life.. We tend to feel low but how we come back again with full force depends on our resilience.. which is God gifted.. Be more resilient ๐Ÿ˜ŠTrust God in all the circumstances, he is above all, our faith in God makes impossible possible.Sharing beautiful poem, song n lines which I received from my dear friend Two years back by Don Meon, which gives immense strength.. It’s OK to feel low n smile back again๐Ÿ˜Š

๐ŸŽถ God will make a way, where there seems to be no way.. He works in ways we cannot see, He will make a way for me.. He will be my guide, Hold me closely to his side.. With love and strength for each new day.. He will make a way, He will make a way๐ŸŽถ

๐ŸŒธBy a roadway in the wilderness He’ll lead me.. Rivers in the desert will I see.. Heaven and Earth will fade.. But His Word will still remain.. And He will do something new today.. God will make a way๐ŸŒธ


..that the God of all the Earth would care to know my name, would care to feel my hurt, who am I, that the bright and morning star would choose to light the way For my ever wandering heart..

” ..Not because of who Iam but because of what you’ve done, Not because of what I’ve done, But because of who you are…

Iam a Flower quickly fading, here today and gone tomorrow, A wave tossed in the ocean, A vapour in the wind, still you hear me when Iam calling..God catch me when I’m falling And you’ve told me who Iam?


Who am I that the eyes that see my sin would look on me with love and watch me rise again๐Ÿ˜‡

Who am I that the voice that calmed the sea would all out through the rain And calm the storm in ME.. Who shall I fear? ’cause…

….Iam yours๐Ÿ™


GOD I come to you.. Let my heart be changed ,renewed ..Flowing from the Grace that I found in you, God I have come to know The weaknesses I see in me will be stripped away,


hold me close, let your love surround me, bring me near, draw me to your side, And as I wait, I’ll rise up like the eagle And I will soar with you, Your spirits leads me on “IN the power of your Love “

๐ŸŒธGod unveil my eyes Let me see you face to face, The knowledge of your love AS YOU LIVE IN ME, God renew my Mind..’I am living Everyday’,


IS anyone crying for help? God is listening ready to rescue you. If your heart is broken, you will find God right here.. He will help you catch your breath, God is there everytime, He is our bodyguard, shielding us.. Trust ๐Ÿ‘

ask believe receive…

Guys help each other if you are in a position to help.. Remember No act of kindness is ever wasted.. Take risk to help someone, it’s gonna be fruitful always.. Go beyond to help n see the universe gives u back in abundance.. Be a God’s child and show in your personality to love, care, help and forgive.




HE IS our all In all๐Ÿ™

..God is faithful to all his promises and loving toward all he has made. God upholds all those who fall and lifts up all who are bowed down..

God is righteous in all his ways and loving toward all he has made. God is near to all who call on him to all who call on him in truth. He fulfills the desires of those who fear him; he hears their cry and saves them. God watches over all who love him, but all the wicked he will destroy. mouth will speak in praise of the God.. Let every creature praise him, forever and ever… I will sing praise as long as I live..

The only true hope of relief for those who are oppressed is the faithful God, God of all heaven and earth, He knows and cares for the needy, whom we tend to ignore. His majestic characteristics :greatness, majesty, power, goodness, righteousness, grace, compassion, loving, glory, splendor, faithfulness, presence,kindness, giving,forgiving, saving,holy etc leads us to praise๐Ÿ˜‡





(this line of blessing everyone I learnt n imitate from a dear Mentor and Friend)

Keep smiling guys๐Ÿค—Happy 2020 ๐ŸŽ‰๐ŸŽŠ


WISDOM-Intellectual Nature,God’s Way.

As inspired,

Special Thankful note to my friends ..Our discussion on ‘In search of God and wisdom ‘ motivated me to explore more on real wisdom beyond Psychology of wisdom. An evening well spent with exchange of thoughts and knowledge from self, environment and scriptures๐Ÿ˜Š

Psychologists tend to agree that wisdom involves integration of knowledge, experience and deep understanding, wisdom encounters in the realm of decision making.will get back soon on ‘Psychology of Wisdom’.

“An ingredient of wisdom is the recognition of personal intellectual need combined with the ability to accept and utilize education”

..Life should be so lived that people become wise as GOD intends.. Wisdom is far more lasting than wealth..

*Only he can teach us to plan our lives and use our time in such manner that we reach the full measure of wisdom.

*He plans for us. Such wisdom leads us to accept the sorrows life brings and to be grateful for signs of God’s love and care.

*Human intellect should lead people to remember and ponder the great acts of God. The wisest people ponder God’s love and learn from the mistakes of others.

..God has given people minds with the expectation that we will use them to evaluate everything we hear and see.. We must decide for ourselves, not simply accept another’s opinion blindly regardless of the position or education of the other person..

*True wisdom centers on obedience to God rather than demanding obedience to or acceptance of our opinions and knowledge.

..those seeking to develop their wisdom and knowledge are willing to be open to the examination of themselves and others..

*Human wisdom finds its basis in God’s reveleation.True Knowledge and judgement come from study of God’s word and will, not from human philosophy and reasoning. Human philosophy helps us understand life when that philosophy is built on trust in God and his revelation.

*Learning has many sources. Powerful humans build up ways to rule and control. Teachers study human traditions and use human reasoning to gain knowledge. Elders rely on long experience in life. Such wisdom used correctly can be good and helpful, but it needs to be secondary.

genuine wisdom comes from God and the study of His word

*Our intellect’s purpose is to build life, not facts. God’s revelation is the place to begin intellectual development. We can build a disciplined and well -ordered life on that foundation. To fail to follow this process is the path of folly. This holds true for young and old, unlearned and wise.

Wisdom is revealed as the basis of all great accomplishments of humanity ,this divine wisdom is offered to all who know and admit their own ignorance.

…People are expected to develop their wisdom to their highest potential.. those who fail to do so can expect to suffer the consequences of their own folly.

*Even a person who is a fool can have access to the wisdom of God. God does not have secret knowledge He wants to give only a few.

..wisdom leads to careful planning for the future..

Genuine wisdom recognizes it’s own limitations and is ready to learn more, self centered pride robs us of the chance to improve.


๐Ÿ™God bless us all ๐Ÿ™

๐ŸŒธdivya ๐ŸŒธ


Truly Inspired

…God’s power always goes beyond our understanding, just as His love is always beyond our expectations..

* God’s sovereign power at work in the World is such that He can provide for the needs of his people anywhere, anytime. Though his people may have been banished to the ends of the earth, God knows where His people are.He can reach out to them with the blessing they need. They may go far from God, but God is never far from them. He may have to let people endure hardship and suffering for a short time in order for them to turn to Him again in their hearts, but God is ready and able to extricate them from their suffering any time they are ready to turn to Him.

…God’s Heart would far rather pour itself out in Love than in wrath…

* Although he may have to chastise His people,God will continue to show loving concern for them. He stands out ready to pour out renewed blessings upon them when they learn their lesson and return to Him in faith.

…what God expects of us is not something beyond our capabilities..

* He is not arbitrary and unrealistic in His expectations of us. He is loving heavenly who has reasonable expectations that His children will respond to Him in faithfulness and loving obedience.When we understand that we live in God’s World, and that He wants us to have a full and meaningful life in His world,then we understand that His commands are not foreign to our best interests.

That is how any thoughtful parent shapes demands of children.

* God’s unique character becomes apparent as His people find refuge and hope in Him.God’s saving acts give a unique identity to his people.

..History shows that God is the only reliable source of security..

* To make Himself known to His people,God empowered human leaders to lead in historical acts as God’s acts.God entrusted his revelation to human agents so other humans could identify with it, trust it,and witness to it.

…God does not wish to remain a mystery.. rather,He wishes to reveal Himself as one true God to all people ..

* God sometimes acts dramatically in His world so that others who look with a degree of sensitivity and perceptiveness will recognize Him as God.If one looks about for evidence of God, it is not hard to see God’s hand in many things .

…God is creator not only of His world but also of us, His people..

The full sounds of a human orchestra are needed to sound God’s praises through the earth.

..Praise should be high, loud,and joyous..







Life has limits. It is limited in duration. Life’s joys also have limits. Life is filled with sorrow. No one escapes grief.

Under such limits we need a sense of God’s unfailing love and care.

* Life should be so lived that people become wise as God intends. Only he can teach us to plan our lives and use our time in such a manner that we reach the full measure of wisdom he plans for us.Such Wisdom leads us to accept the sorrows life brings and to be grateful for signs of God’s love and care.

* As long as life was thought to be limited by death, then God’s greatest act of mercy was understood to be the granting of long life under God’s protection .


…why do you see the speck that is in other’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye..take the log out of your own eye and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of other’s eye…

My Special thankful note to

Dr Shabnam Gurung for motivating me to pen down on this soul searching concept ๐Ÿ˜Š .Inspired me to take a deep dive into the ocean of my thoughts,Psychology,varied theories and philosophical aspect behind the universal human tendency,to blame , which is all around us-not just in politics, but in business, at school, workplace,among family members and friends. Perhaps even today you have participated in -or heard someone blaming others for a mistake, fault or error that has caused inconvenience or pain.

B L A M E :

.. In gen. feel or declare that someone or something is responsible for a fault or wrong.

* Blaming is a characteristic of individual’s social behavior and reflects individual’s psychological fear of failure.

In our society there are three kinds of people,

one: who have adequate moral courage to accept the responsibility of result.

Second : people who do not have adequate courage to accept the failure but at the same time they possess some moral values that stops them blaming others for their failure and their final act of blaming depends on the circumstances as well as the intensity of the result.

Third : people who possess no moral values and will have no hesitation to blame others for their failure, but on the other hand they will leave no stone unturned to take the credit for the success .

* According to Psychology, blame,a psychological projection is a defence mechanism in which human Ego defends itself against Unconscious impulses or qualities(both +ve & -ve) by denying their existence in themselves while attributing them to others.

* A’ blamer ‘ is a type of narcissist who in their own eye, can do no wrong .Everything that happens wrong around or to them,whether their own fault or not, is immediately blamed on the other people in their life.

* A Scapegoat ,an expedient on the other hand is a person who is blamed for the wrong doings, mistakes or faults of others, esp for reasons necessary to achieve something, though not always right or fair.

* Self Blame is a cognitive process in which an individual attributes the occurence of a stressful event to oneself. The direction of blame often has implications for individual’s emotions and behaviors during and following stressful situations . Self blame is a common reaction to stressful events and has certain effects on how individuals adapt to it.

..self blame is a component of self directed emotions like guilt and self disgust..

Thus blaming self repeatedly invites negative thoughts, anxiety and depression which can have an adverse effect on mental being of an individual and also on physical being, as our brain has an ability to convert stressful mental energies into physical pain in any part of the body. Instead of blaming self it’s better to take the responsibility and lesson learnt forever on self and move ahead deleting negative emotions from mind for a healthy mind and body.

* Blame Shifter, means changing our behavior to recognize and accept of whatever impact it had on our mind and we are keen to make changes and become a better person for our own sake and good and for the sake and good of those around us.

What will be your knee-jerk reaction would normally be? Is it embarassement, responsibility, fear, guilt, or feeling of inadequacy ??think it over.

When something happens that we know normally trigger a -ve defensive reaction from us, what do we do in that moment ?

Taking a deep breath and reframe the opportunity to learn. No one has ever gotten anywhere in life without experiencing some major failures along the way. Every single mistake we make from the tiny ones, teaches us life lessons and allows to grow. Its when we introspect and take responsibility to why things happened the way it happened.


Labelling theory accounts for blame by postulating that,“when intentional actions act out to continuously blame an individual for non-existent psychological traits and for non-existent variables those act or aim to induce irrational guilt at unconscious level” blameworthy the person or persons are higher if it were an intentional act and higher if when unintentional they could have and should have prevented.why we respond to tragedies all wrong.

* According to Dr Alasko, there are two functions of blame, finding fault with another person or group and Transferring responsibility onto someone else, both by using criticism ,accusation,punishment and humiliation. We then use these behaviors for one of four reasons;

1. To change someone’s behavior.

2. To vent a feeling.

3. To escape personal responsibility.

4. To protect ourselves.

Second one deals with blame’s origins as part of the human FIGHT or FLIGHT instinct.

* It is posited, means put something forward as fact or as basis for argument that blame can be traced to our roots as social creatures, as a way of protecting one’s status within the community. we become a victim when we blame ourselves or others for some problem or error.

When we assign blame we are pointing the finger to who or what is responsible for a fault or for a wrong doing . We are trying to make others accountable .Blaming thus does not solve a problem it usually only makes people defensive.

…blame is a unique moral judgement ..that is both cognitive and social, regulates social behavior and fundamentally relies on social cognition ,i.e ,the process of obtaining knowledge through thought , experience and the senses.

Humans consciously and unconsciously make Judgements about other people. Provides a way of ‘devaluing ‘ others with the end result that the blamer feels superior seeing others as less worthwhile making the blamer perfect.

…the behavior of blaming can also be related to LEADERSHIP.. the People who have courage to ACCEPT the RESPONSIBILITY of the result can be GOOD LEADERS in the society..

Whereas the people who have the habit of blaming others can lead to unhealthy and harmful environment in the society in long run.

..blaming other people can provide us with an excuse to act in a hurtful manner.. it’s a way of justifyng our actions to ourselves to remove our brain’s natural inhibitions that are there to prevent us from behaving poorly toward others..

Means we can build a thought pattern that allows us to act in a way that our moral compass would normally prevent.

* According to motivational Psychology, blame is the demonstrated lack of self respect choosing to deposit one’s -ve actions onto others to reinforce one’s view of being good, fair and approved. The only thing blame does is to keep the focus off you when you are looking for external reasons to explain your unhappiness or frustration .You may succeed in making another feel guilty about something by blaming, but you won’t succeed in changing whatever it is about you that is making you unhappy .

* According to Organization Psychlogy, Blame Business Life by Stephen Fineman ,Blame is fascinating – it shapes our lives. It can be a benign (cheerful and kindly) way of positioning ourselves, a gentle ,joust or banter, or it can be poisonous,hurtful or devastating for its victims . It can.. tear apart bonds, fracture work relationships, disable major social programmes , can inflict damage on powerful corporations ; it can bring down governments, it can start wars and justify genocides.

Blame creates biases. We accuse others to defend our position..

..biases get in our way affecting our perception of what really occured..its one sided and irrational .Taking ownership drives action.

..we focus on others instead of doing soul searching..

* Blame game can be addictive . Regardless of how well you play , you will never win . You create more suffering over your suffering.

…let the person who is without sin/mistake cast the stone… implies that nobody is blameless & hence is not qualified to blame others.

so why do we still put blame on others and at what costs to ourselves? Blaming someone for your wrongs will not take you to heaven. Take responsibility, do what is right and forget it. Bring the change and renew thoughts and personality .

…A bad/false blame will beat a good person everytime..

* We convince ourselves that it really is someone else’s fault, but sometimes we know we’re lying,easier that way.

* No matter how much people love us, there is only a certain number of times most people will tolerate taking the blame for something that genuinely wasn’t their fault.

* Face up and apologize, recognize that it was your mistake initially & that you made a second mistake in trying to escape taking responsibility for it. The discomfort of the situation will probably encourage you to own up at the first opportunity next time.

…sometimes we mess up spectacularly but we’re often guilty of making mountains from mole hills…

“Problem of major proportions in relationships that of noticing others’ personality flaws to the exclusion of our own weaknesses. The approach of true humility recognizes & begins work on our own faults first. We will do this when we step in the other person’s shoes and judge things from that perspective .This order builds from the essence of law referred as Golden Rule”.

* Behavioral aspect of blaming is a kind of Psychological dis-order which sets in from childhood stage.

…fear mongering & insecure environments are major factor contributing to inculcate the blaming attitude of any individual..

Supportive Parents & secure environment in Childhood can help the child to become stronger and accept the responsibility without any fear of failure.

…for each one should carry his own load…

* Individuals who are ready to accept their fault for their own or group failure are better learner whereas on the other hand people who blame others cannot learn from their mistakes because they failed to realise the actual cause of failure and hence will not take corrective measures for future.

* Accepting the responsibility for the result will not only help in analysing and taking corrective measures for better results but will also establish supremacy of the individual as a responsible reliable person .

…The Judgement does remind us not to unsurp GOD’s authority and Judge others …

…people having blaming attitude will have a tendency for rash/rude/escaping behavior ..


…stop looking out the window & look in the mirror…

Embrace the uncomfortable experience of challenging yourself


Be in a good positive company where expecting never brings hurting and blame on self and others.

Soulstuffed love to my adorable family/my handful genuine adorable besties for life for being there always with all luv and motivation.Heartfelt Thanks to all Good lovely people in my life for all positive vibes and motivation.



๐ŸŒธ .…divya….๐ŸŒธ


An interesting topic to explore as Quantum Physicists peer into the nature of reality, the more evidence they are finding that everything is energy.

My Special thanks to” Dr Vinay Rananaware for suggesting me to pen down on this very vast and limitless concept with limitless researches and scientific findings. a man thinks, so is he..

The Principle of Attraction is an evidence based phenomenon with a Foundation in Positive Psychology, goal achieving research, and mind-brain sciences.

The Principle of attraction is not magic and neither a Universal law. But everything in our Universe is all about Energy.

It is a social-scientific phenomenon which basically works on the Principle that,.

….Thoughts Controls Reality…

Means your positive attitude, beliefs and behavior will most likely bring you more to law of attraction.The Principle states that,

“Like tends to attract Like”

and therefore positivity attracts positivity and negativity -negativity.

The latest scientific discoveries point more and more to a fundamental Energy that works throughout the entire Universe and connects everything to everything else.

* The complete order of the Universe is determined including everything that comes into your life & that you experience. Does magnetic power of your thoughts, regardless of age, nationality, religious beliefs .

…..We are all susceptible to the laws which govern the Universe….

It is the law of attraction which uses the “Power of Mind” to translate whatever is in our thoughts and “materialize them into reality “

yes Magnetic effect of our own energy and thoughts with that of other people.

…Scientific facts prove that Law of attraction exists as per Research in Psychology, Philosophy ,Evolutionary Biology, Neuroscience and Genetics….

* Law of attraction has Platonic Roots, 391 BC. Famous Greek Philosopher Plato noted that “Like attracts Like”

your thoughts send out ‘magnetic vibrations’ that literally attract what you want to…

* Acc. to Positive Psychology Researcher,Barbara Fredrickson, +ve feelings tend to broaden our perspectives so that we notice the multitude of possibilities that are already there. There’s no need to attract good things, they are already around us,we just have to notice them.

* Acc. to Neurologists ,visualization creates a better future. Scientists working at the Wellcome Trust Centre for neuroimaging at the institute of Neurology in London have discovered that, people who visualize a better future are more likely to bring that future into existence, which is exactly what the law of attraction tells us. It says that,

…daily,vivid mental images of a better life help to draw that life towards us…

* Psychologists support the use of Affirmations (another key tool in our law of attraction Arsenal) . According to a research at the University of Exeter, it was found that people who consistently tell themselves that they can meet a goal are more likely to secure a Positive outcome.

…Affirmations are proven to help with recovery from trauma, improve anticipatory planning, aid treatment of depression and boost physical health…

Law of attraction was originally used in the late 1800s & promoted in Psychological Spiritual Circles, it gained popularity when it was promoted in the 2006 film The Secret (by Oprah Winfrey)

...Everything one wants/needs can be satisfied by believing in an outcome repeatedly thinking about it and maintaining positive emotional states to attract the desired outcome..

* Mirror Neurons help to explain the spread of good vibrations. For eg; when someone sees you radiating positivity, this same response is mirrored in the brain of the observer. This can draw them to act positively towards you as well. Studies on ” amygdala “(the brains emotional center) show that we induce feelings of fear and anxiety in others if we ourselves are fearful or anxious.

* Geneticists show that

…. limiting beliefs are inherited…

We should not feel guilty for our limiting beliefs but rather work to identify and change them. While you may have beliefs that are holding you back, you are not solely responsible for them.New Neurological evidence support our ability to manifest what we want from life.

…Law of attraction is the attractive magnetic power of the Universe that draws similar energies together… It manifests through the “power of creation”,everywhere and in many ways….

Even the Law of gravity is part of the law of attraction.

This law attracts thoughts, ideas, people, situations & circumstances

It is the law & power that brings together people of similar interests who unite into various groups,such as political gps, sports team/fans,friends,fraternities uses the power of mind, thoughts, imagination and words.

…is a manifestation of the ‘creative power of the universe’. It is through this law that everything is created : galaxies, planets, metals, rocks, plants/animals and people…


LOA MOTTO : ask > believe > receive

* The LOA is a Scientific approach ;…..Use of Energy to bring about what you want from you. By sending +ve or -ve energies throughout the Universe or cosmos to attract that of the same a three step process. Energies sent must be accompanied by coinciding actions. Sending out the desired attraction will only attract the situations which enable us to create our own desire, results by the choices we make within that situation(actions speak louder than words).In the same way Faith by itself, if it is not accompanied by a action, is dead.

* Faith is nothing but our complete trust or confidence in someone or something, in a person,a particular religion,remedy etc. …for eg; we trust in God and in his actions and promises. Strong /unshakeable belief in something esp without proof or evidence.

…faith is the assurance of things hoped for, the conviction of things not seen…

Faith is both Intellectual assent(believing that something is true) and Trust(Relying on the fact that something is true) .Aren’t we human beings have all our faith in God,the Almighty!

…We view God as a strong positive energy /force…

we are superb at asking and usually we are clear on what it is we want. As we pray and receive whatever we ask from him bcz we believe it will served.

...believing can be hard bcz we have to believe in the unseen inorder to get what we want..

“whatever you ask for in prayer believe that you have received it and it will be yours “Likewise we have faith in our close people/Friends as we look unto them thru our thick and thin. We love spending time/emotions /secrets with them cz of our immense faith and kind of same energy they vibrate as ours which is above caste, colour, age,religion etc.It just clicks.As we learnt above’ like attracts like’ which is nothing but LOA.

… LOA and Faith are similar ..

It is not enough just to wish for something,you need strong desire and faith to manifest what you want. In order for your thoughts to manifest you have to repeat them often & add feelings, desire & interest. The mind acts like a magnet. Similar energy attracts similar energy .

…we all use this law though most unconsciously…

* God created the world by speaking it into being. We are created in his image, therefore we too have a creative power to speak into situations and bring about radical change.

* The balance is the powerful spiritual principle that will allow the things we need to flow to us instead of us trying to visually divert them away.

…Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen…

* share your success stories with others so that their faith will be strengthened and they can receive encouragement.

…whatever is true/honorable/right/pure/good repute/praiseworthy,if there is any excellence, let your mind dwell on these things…

* Believe you deserve it and the universe will serve it.
…..”we do not look at the things which are seen but the things which are not seen. For the things which are seen are temporary but the things which are not seen are eternal“….


* Prayer as we are taught it deals with God who can hear us and if we ask something it will happen. That leads us to the LOA which talks about an invisible energy within the universe.

…prayer causes to focus and the law of attraction causes everything in the universe that’s in vibrational harmony with our focus to come to us…

* The LOA explains in the moment that someone desires something that it is given in an energetic format or their prayer is answered.

* Includes things that have been wanted that may not have even been verbalised as the LOA states that whatever is wanted is created instantly in any moment that someone has a preference for something to be better or different,no matter how subtle the preference may be.

* LOA is an extremely useful system as it provides techniques to help people shift their beliefs to get more into a mode of allowing in which they trust that what they have asked for has been given

.…its not about informing the universe what we want, as the universe is already aware of everything that we have ever asked for but rather it works by us focussing on what is wanted which activates the LOA and allows it to bring us more of what we have asked for…

* The Universe list can also be utilised to pray for others. The LOA states that focusing positively on other people from a place of alignment can be incredibly powerful and as thought operates on the level of non-physical energy,it is powerful whether they are in close proximity of living in a completely different location.we can only influence them in the direction of their own dreams and desires.

…APPRECIATION process in which we express or write down everything good that has happened and everything good that is already in our life keeps us in a receptive mode of allowing and feel happier as we notice how much the UNIVERSE IS ASSISTING US…




And the Crux is, It’s All About,



Heartfelt thanks to my family,all my adorable besties of life and all good people m associated with strong positive vibes and energy making everyday beautiful in the positive aura๐Ÿ˜ŠLOA binds us๐Ÿ’ž.




The first and most important classroom in the school of life is home. Both father and mother are expected to assume responsibility for training and nurturing the minds of children. Learning kindles a desire for more learning. Parents must discipline children to have a chance in life. Without discipline and correction we never learn.

We learn a great deal, both good and bad, by imitating the behavior of others.

…This educational principle is widely recognized by contemporary Psychologists ..

A hunger for knowledge is the mark of a wise person

Wisdom makes us understand our need for learning.

*Observant parents and teachers know by experience that learners react differently to various forms of criticism and correction .Some children seem unaffected by even the harshest punishment; others wither under the mildest scolding.

* To a sensitive, intelligent child, a rebuke can sometimes accomplish more than a hundred stripes. The wise and effective teacher stays attuned to such individual differences.

Parental discipline should always be corrective in nature, never vindictive.

“let them do as they choose

*The learner’s self-discipline is more important than extremely imposed discipline.

The presence of good teaching does not guarantee learning, for learning is an active process in which learners seek knowledge and apply themselves to the task.

*Indifference, self -sufficiency, or dullness of mind can close our ears to words of wisdom.

We do not acquire knowledge by sitting passively and waiting for it. We must search for it as though it were a hidden treasure

*Beginning in infancy, human beings learn by imitating the behavior of others. The examples other set are not always positive .Negative emotions are contagious. Unfortunately, children whose parents are temperamental have no choice in the matter. Brought up under the daily influence of angry parents, they learn to be hot-tempered person themselves.

* By self-discipline and associating with the right people, we can unlearn bad habits acquired as children .

..We cannot blame our problems on our parents. We must take responsibility for ourselves and set good examples for our families, friends and associates…

As inspired๐Ÿ˜Š….. To be contd.


What type of BRAIN do you actually have?

The ‘Brain’ is the central processing unit of the body and plays a key role in translating the content of the ‘Mind’.

The MIND (not to be confused with the brain )is a set of ‘cognitive faculties’ which includes our consciousness,perception,thoughts,feelings,attitudes,beliefs,memories,imagination,judgement,language, memory – Responsible for processing feelings and emotions resulting in attitudes and actions.

With all messages requesting to come up with another Psychology fun test,here Iam sharing an interesting test to find out, what type of brain do you actually have? Again for all those who did not attempt this test.keep suggesting guys,reinforces positively๐Ÿ˜Š

…the mind is like a parachute, it works best when it is opened… Let’s explore

Answer the following questions and find out!

*For each question simply answer A, B, C, D, and E.

*Answer all ten questions ,track your points and add them up at the end.

*Be honest and instant ,it would be more revealing and related to you.

*Write down your options on a paper instantly.

*Remember in all the Psychological tests there is no right or wrong answers, so be free and enjoy.

1. How do you learn best?

2. How often do you use Emoji?

3. Choose one from the following

4. What do you find easiest?

5. You like to…

6. You like to associate with people who…

7. What study technique works best for you?

8. Which Job would you be most happy doing?

9. When faced with a familiar problem, what do you like to do?

10. The course of study best suited to you…

* Track your Points and Add up all the points:

1. A- 30, B-40, C-10, D-20, E-50

2. A-20, B-50, C-10, D-40, E-30

3. Square-50, Circle – 20, Triangle-30, irregular form-10,Rectangle-40

4. A-40, B-30, C-20, D-10, E-50

5. A-20, B-10,C-30, D-40, E-50

6. A-50, B-40, C-20, D-30, E-10

7. A-30, B-20, C-10, D-40, E-50

8. A-50, B-30, C-10, D-40, E-20

9. A-40, B-10, C-20, D-50, E-30

10. A-40, B-10, C-30, D-20, E-50



* 100-160 (CREATIVE BRAIN)

You have a creative brain. You love to come up with your own solutions to problems & likely to spend your free time in imagination ,of inventing something unique or creating new things, whether it be an art, writing content,decorating,or anything creative.


You have an emotional brain. You are easily upset but easily pleased too. You often feel as though your emotions are running your life. You can be moved easily, whether that’s a play, a movie,music, a book or simply an interaction on the street.

* 260-330 (MUSICAL BRAIN)

You have a musical brain. You feel a strong connection with music & often find yourself stuck with a ‘song ‘ in the back of your mind. You have a flexible mind that helps you understand & value thoughts and feelings in yourself and in others.

* 340-420 (LOGICAL BRAIN)

You have a logical brain. You are Patient, considerate and rational. You excel at Problem solving and attracted to logic puzzles, experiments, strategy games and arithmetic problems. You apply logic in everything you do.


You have a Philosophical brain. You’re intuitive and a deep thinker. You notice things what other people don’t. While most people just shake these thoughts away, you are drawn to such questions and instantly have logical answers for them which amazes people.

So what’s your brain type? we all have a combo of all but little higher on some parts.

..Hope you all enjoyed as much as I enjoyed putting it for you…๐Ÿ˜Š

Everything is in mind ๐Ÿ˜‡